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| February 2nd, 2006 |
The dull days of January were a good time to play catch-up. In the onslaught
of holiday movies, I missed a few. Here they are: Rumor has it...that RUMOR
HAS IT...is not very good. Rumor no more. It is awful. Forced to endure lame
direction by Rob Reiner and a diabolically, dumbfoundingly dreadful screenplay
by T. M. (Ted) Griffin, a game, attractive, and usually reliable cast is reduced
to the shameful sloppiness of amateurs. Oh, well. They’ve survived worse.
They’ll survive Rumor Has It, an anemic milkshake that turns into buttermilk
before you can find the exit door.
Assuming you haven’t seen it (what, are you crazy?) the plot is about
which Pasadena family The Graduate was based on. On New Year’s Eve in
1963, a 21-year-old college nerd sleeps with a 42-year-old woman and runs away
with her daughter. They marry different people. The young man’s roommate
publishes a book called The Graduate. Tongues wag. In 1967, the movie comes
out, with Dustin Hoffman as the goon, Anne Bancroft as Mrs. Robinson, and Katharine
Ross as her daughter, and the deepest, darkest secret of one Pasadena family
becomes immortalized. Cut to 1997. Jennifer Aniston, as a neurotic Manhattan
career girl who can’t write anything better than obituaries for the New
York Times, flies to Pasadena with her fiancé (Mark Ruffalo) for the
wedding of her little sister (Mena Suvari) and through a series of unconvincing
plot maneuvers too contrived to go into, becomes convinced that Mrs. Robinson
was her drunken, chain-smoking grandmother (all grown up to be Shirley MacLaine).
Worse still, she thinks her own mother, who died when she was nine, was pregnant
by the same man (now grown up to be Kevin Costner, who looks nothing whatever
like Dustin Hoffman). She has nothing in common with her family and hates Pasadena,
so when she learns her mother had an affair with Mr. Costner nine months before
she was born, she ships her fiancé home and looks him up, thinking he’s
her father. Who knew he’d be so handsome and rich and groovy and wear
designer clothes and own his own vineyard? He flies her to his house in Half
Moon Bay, then to the Napa Valley wine country, and back to San Francisco for
a charity ball and all she’s got is a backpack, out of which comes an
amazing array of evening dresses and nighties.
Before it’s over, Mr. Costner has slept with every woman in her family,
which makes Ms. Aniston something of a slut. He claims she couldn’t be
sleeping with her own father, because he’s been sterile for 39 years because
of a “testicular trauma” delivered by a goalie on his soccer team
who kicked the wrong ball. These are the jokes, folks, and they don’t
get any better or cheaper.
Nothing is remotely believable here, especially the bitchy, obnoxious lines
they’ve given Shirley MacLaine as the grandmother from hell. (“Come
in, I’ll put on a pot of bourbon!”) There is also the shuddering
sight of a trashy, platinum-blonde Kathy Bates as an aunt who mixes bloody marys
all day and sings songs from South Pacific. It’s all pretty gruesome,
and Ms. Aniston is so twitchy and screwy she seems to be going through menopause
20 years too early.
If you do want to see something you might have unwisely overlooked in the year-end
pandemonium, head straight for Woody Allen’s brilliant, mesmerizing MATCH
POINT. American critics (who have been less than loving toward Woody recently)
are going ape over Match Point, while Europeans, who always genuflect and shower
him with awards, have been more lukewarm. Go figure. Match Point is my favorite
Woody Allen movie since Manhattan Murder Mystery, but I disagree with comparisons
to Hitchcock.
More like A Place in the Sun set in London, if you ask me, with Jonathan Rhys-Meyers
(the British Tom Cruise—only a better actor) in the Montgomery Clift role
and Scarlett Johansson stealing the show in the Shelley Winters part—re-written
as the only American character in the film, a loose, free-loving, confused Yank
(or Yankette?) who stands between the hero and his place in the upper echelons
of English society. It’s a film of great resourcefulness with a moral
about luck and fate that is chilling.
Mr. Rhys-Meyers plays Chris Wilton, an opera-loving tennis coach on the make
at an exclusive private club who befriends a rich client named Tom (Matthew
Goode), worms his way into a posh job with the help of Tom’s parents (Brian
Cox and Penelope Wilton), and prepares to marry the boss’s daughter, Chloe
(Emily Mortimer). He’s not really a cad or a bounder, but he’s a
poor boy from Ireland who is new to London and is rather ambitious. The trouble
is, on a weekend in the country at the estate of his new mentors, he becomes
sexually aroused by Tom’s fiancée, Nola (ivory-complexioned Ms.
Johansson), a neurotic American actress who has the bad form to get pregnant
and complicate things with no end in sight. Nola is the key to sensual ecstasy;
Chloe is the loving and supportive girl who can open all the doors to wealth
and success. For a while, Chris is shagging them both, torn between the best
of both worlds. But his luck begins to change when Nola’s nagging and
Chloe’s craving for a family of her own lead him to reckless behavior.
He’d like to have his crumpets and eat them too, but the only way out
is murder.
Sex in Woody’s films is usually comical to the point of parody. Here,
however, we get the whole banana (no pun intended), which explains the young
man’s obsession (the hedonistic American is wilder in bed than the sweet
but dull Brit) and outlines his emotional dilemma. The point of the film is
that his plan to escape goes wrong because of a mere twist of bad luck. It’s
like the spin of a roulette wheel. One move to the right or the left, and you
can win or lose everything you’ve invested. In Chris’s final solution,
the ball, in fact, falls on the wrong side of the net. Hence Match Point, a
term in tennis that serves as the title of the film.
Crossing the Atlantic for the first time, Woody does for London and the idyllic
British countryside what he has always done for Manhattan and the Hamptons.
From the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace and the trendy art galleries
on the Thames, to polo ponies and grouse hunting in Buckinghamshire, he transports
you to a different world, but it’s just as entrancing as the old neighborhood
back home. You wouldn’t mistake Match Point as the work of a British director.
London is too luxurious, its inhabitants too trippy and operatic. Still, it
has Woody’s humor and subtlety. No British bluntness here. The acting
is first-cabin all the way. And it’s genuinely moving. Move it to the
top of your must-see list.
FATELESS, the first important release of 2006, is the autobiographical study
of a 14-year-old Hungarian Jewish boy who miraculously lived through Hitler’s
death camps, written by Imre Kertesz, who won the Nobel Prize. This disturbing
film by the respected director Lajos Koltai is worthy and serious and heartbreaking
but hard to recommend.
On one hand, I understand the driving need for survivors of the Holocaust to
tell their stories in books and films until the end of time. On the other hand,
I hope they won’t judge us too harshly if we sometimes look the other
way. When it comes to the blackest chapter in the history of human depravity,
there are limits to how much we can read, watch, and endure while they remember.
Mr. Kertesz, who wrote his own screen adaptation, calls himself Gyuri Koves
in the film, which begins when his father’s business fails and he’s
sent to a forced labor camp, leaving the teenager home with his stepmother.
Suddenly, on a warm day in June 1944, he was forced off a bus in Budapest and
crowded into a boxcar on its way to Auschwitz. As the hope drains from the inmates’
lives, the color drains out of the film. For two-plus hours, we follow the innocent,
frightened youngster as he is transported from one concentration camp to another,
while his friends disappear and he is surrounded by strangers. Surviving pestilence,
torture, disease, starvation, and bitter cold, the boy surrenders all hope of
rescue, sacrificing his youth for a scrap of stale bread or a pair of shoes
with mud seeping through the soles.
Because the film is told through the eyes of a boy who hasn’t yet given
up on the human race, the story has moments of humor and bonding. Baffled and
alone, he still struggles to find meaning in his tragic fate as he stoically
suffers the brutality of camp life. And there are miracles: On his way to the
crematorium in a cart of naked corpses, the boy is dragged off to the hospital
in Buchenwald and saved by doctors who were fellow prisoners. At no time does
he play the victim. Sadly, however, the hardships did not end when the camps
were liberated. Trying to get home to the rubble that was Budapest under the
Russians was just as daunting. Back in the ruins, Gyorgy is forced to draw upon
the memory of small gestures of humanity to stay sane, but in the end, we are
brought to tears by the lonely face and lucid mind of a child whose heart is
as pure—and as cold—as snow.
Marcell Nagy’s performance in the central role is haunting. Precocious
at the beginning, then maturing into astonishing alienation in the post-war
community of his youth, the young actor’s transformation is profound.
Mr. Kertesz’s script offers a nuanced, original, and deeply philosophical
take on occupation-era Europe that sets Fateless apart from other Holocaust
dramas. The sprawling themes and cast of hundreds make it the most expensive
movie ever made in Hungary, and it is nominated for this year’s foreign-film
Academy Award.
But director Koltai expertly renders the private, intimate details that make
the story so devastating with an atmospheric use of color and lighting that
justify his reputation as a world-famous cinematographer. (His most recent film
was the lavish Being Julia, which offers proof of his versatility.) When it
comes to these wrenching horror stories that serve as witnesses to the cruelty
and inhumanity of man, I’m at the point where enough is enough. But more
than just another clichéd Holocaust memoir, Fateless is something special—an
unforgettable portrait of grief and hope, loss, and transcendence.